So….how is your wife doing? Karla speaks. We listen.

Many of you have asked about how my wife Karla is doing with this new turn of Providence in our lives.  I have asked Karla to weigh in for herself.  She agreed.  Here it is:

Today I had several friends e-mail and call asking me how I was doing.  The response they got depended on when they contacted me.  One friend got a quick, upbeat response, and another an ocean of tears.   It’s still a roller coaster ride for me.  Mike said that he writes to deal with the current situation, and I said that I cry.  But that’s not always the case.  I’m also pretty good at putting up a front.  Nobody wants to wear their feelings on their sleeve all the time.  My mind is often churning, thinking about how I should handle everything, thinking of how my parents handled my brother’s health problems, thinking about how life has changed and could change even more.

I also respond like the black-and-white statistician that I am.  I want that thing out of his head and I want it done in the safest way possible and I want it gone yesterday!  Unfortunately, the statistics being thrown at me are not that cut and dried.  61% chance of bleeding in Mike’s lifetime, 10-15% rate of significant deficit following open surgery, 40% chance of obliteration following gamma knife procedure, possible aphasia, hemiparesis, or worse, Rankin scale (Mike’s currently at 0, which is good), Spetzler-Martin grade (Mike’s a 3-4, which is operable), good risk because he’s male and has no deep-venous drainage, some risk because the AVM is large .  Do you see what I mean?  This is not easily sorted out, which is what I want.

So God has us waiting on Him again.  I try to keep in mind that our kids are watching.  It’s another storm swirling around us, but Jesus is still the anchor of our souls (Hebrews 6:19).   My goals through this are to stand firm in the faith, help Mike, and make sure my children know that God is in control of their world, even when everything feels out of control.  Simple but lofty.  Pray that God would grant me these!

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4 thoughts on “So….how is your wife doing? Karla speaks. We listen.”

  1. Mike & Karla,
    I love you both and am praying earnestly for you.
    Mike – we miss you at hoops but know that in our loving Father’s perfect timing you’ll once again be clearing out the lane and making those crazy shots. We will continue praying till our Father answers according to His will. Thanks for the blog. The faith you both display is hugely encouraging.
    Dan

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  2. Karla –
    It’s a simple verse – one that I go to again and again
    Isaiah 41:13 For I am the Lord, your God,who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear, I will help you.
    You and your family are in our prayers constantly…may you feel His peace that passes all understanding.
    Thank you for sharing this blog with us all…it is a great testimony of faith.
    Jeri

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  3. Hello Karla and Mike,

    I think Karla will remember me from HEED, which is how I found out about your mountain. I can totally relate to “I want that thing out of his head…yesterday…” and all that entails, as my own husband had a tumor in his kidney and that is exactly how I felt. I thought, “If I could reach in there and get it myself, I would,” but I had to rely on people who knew what to do…and trust that it didn’t need to come out yesterday (I’m still not convinced….).

    Karla…I understand the roller coaster you’re on…and so I know that you’ve experienced that same peace that passes understanding. Truly it does! Even when my heart is breaking and I’m crying…or yelling (don’t know if you’ve been upset, but I have been, and I don’t like going there) still His peace is with me.

    Right now I know so many wives who homeschool that are on the same ride we are, and I can hardly take it in. But I know this…God is with us. It’s okay to cry, at least that is what I keep telling myself. If I try to have a day where I don’t, then I get a headache. If I just let the tears come, there are days when they don’t.

    When we began our journey with cancer (September 2), I realized the Lord knew all along that tumor was there. He knew this bump in the road was coming, and that we’d be sitting on the side of the road for a while. I like to think we’re at a wayside picnic place…but the food I’ve brought isn’t all that great because I wasn’t planning for this stop. However, He was. And He’s brought plenty for us to eat. You know?

    Jim has asked that Lamentations be prayed over him, the entire book, but most specifically what just happens to be in the very middle: This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope. It is of the LORD’S mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness. The LORD is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him. Quite honestly, I wept at reading it, and so I didn’t read it, he did. He explained to the kids that he is right there in the middle, sitting in His mercy.

    Not the path I would have chosen, and quite frankly, I don’t want to be on this path, but if God is on this path, that’s where I want to be.

    Thanks, Mike, for starting this blog. Your words are very encouraging, and encouragement in the Word is really what we all need. Karla…it goes without saying that I will ask the Lord to shower all and more that you’ve asked for.

    Deborah

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  4. Hey, Karla,

    I heard from our friend Lynn here in the Twin Cities that you had this blog up. That’s very dramatic news you’re hearing. We had occasion to pray for a girl here a few years ago who lost consciousness because of a cerebral AVM but who is now in good health and very active. Just wanted to let you know we care about you here and would be glad to help and encourage you however we can.

    Karl and Grace

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