Here we are at another Sunday morning. I guess I missed my chance at a good tagline with the Saturday Evening Post. I needed to get to the house I’m staying at and get some laundry done. For some reason I had no clean clothes left!
This is our third Sunday here and neurologically we are essentially back to where we were two weeks ago. Mike is quite frustrated with the pain from the heart surgery and the lack of movement. He keeps saying, “I lost three weeks,” which, true to male form, is a slight exaggeration, but difficult to handle nonetheless. He did not realize it was Sunday, and got rather emotional when I told him that. I don’t have the heart to tell him that it is March now.
The cardiac surgeon says that Mike is making good progress. He is off all of the heart medications and will have the last two big tubes pulled today. The only IV medications left are heparin and antibiotics. Everything else is taken by pill. I am hoping that once those tubes are out he will be much more comfortable and start talking more.
I had a difficult time getting to sleep last night. The weight of what really happened on Thursday really hit me yesterday. I knew the seriousness of blood clots in the heart and lungs, but I thought, “We’re at Mayo Clinic. Just get them out of there and he’ll be fine.” I did not understand how blood clots go between the heart and lungs and out to the body. No one knew how many clots there were. I did not understand the size of the clot in Mike’s heart. I did not understand that time was critical. Thankfully Dr. Sundt was able to do the surgery immediately. In retrospect, I am thankful that I did not fully comprehend what was going on and see that as a mercy from God. It was difficult enough to endure the wait without having full understanding.
A former pastor of ours e-mailed me on Thursday during the surgery. He said that he was approaching the throne of God on my behalf. In the midst of everything, I was quite moved that someone was praying that Mike would survive for my sake and my children’s sake. As I thought about it, that really was my thinking as well. It was hard for me to think about the possibility of life without Mike. I certainly do not like seeing Mike in all this pain or the frustration he is experiencing. But I am thankful that God saw fit to answer this prayer in the way we wanted, all the while knowing that the real reason is that this is how He will be most glorified. God gets the glory and I get the joy…of having my husband hold my hand, tell me he loves me, and having him here another day.